So many have captured Carrie so perfectly, it’s hard to come up with words that don’t say the exact same thing as many of those that loved her have already said, but here it goes...
Sometimes one thinks about legacy and what that means. How will one be remembered, what impact has one made on others. When you are one of the little guys, not a brilliant scientist, a famous actor, or a successful politician, it’s easy to think that what is left after we pass is not tremendously powerful. When we lost Carrie I began to get calls, emails, visitors all with a story about how Carrie had touched them. Sometimes it was in very small ways, like a conversation in the ladies’ room, sometimes it was in grand acts and sometimes it was through years of friendship. Carrie had the same impact on others that a big name like Lady Diana had. Even those who didn’t know her well, loved her. I’m convinced that was because Carrie was not only beautiful on the outside, but powerfully beautiful on the inside. She had a unique way of being many things at the same time: strong, caring, smart and magnetic. She was the type of person you wanted to be around.
Carrie was the type of friend that was completely selfless. Lynn and I would often joke that Carrie was too good a person to be friends with 2 sarcastic people like us, but regardless of our dark sense of humor she loved us. Carrie’s concern was always pointed outward rather than on herself. This was how it was when she was healthy and continued to be how she operated as her health declined. One day I was having a pretty simple test that I was concerned about. Chris, my husband was out of town. Carrie insisted that she come with me. I almost felt silly that she was there, this was nothing and most assuredly would be good news. It turned out the news wasn’t good, and Carrie was there to take over. She took my keys as the tears overtook me and with authority treated me to a sunny brunch where we ended up laughing until our cheeks hurt. That is how Carrie continued to be, her care for others was unwavering. Over the last year I would receive calls from her during a hospital stay where the focus of the entire conversation was on the latest in my fertility journey. Any issue she was dealing with personally, was treated as passé. “Oh, I’m just dehydrated, no big deal, but how are you, I’m worried about you.” That was Carrie.
Carrie wasn’t just a tender heart, her love for adventure and her competitive drive also defined her, but never ever made her intimidating. She loved to share and engage others in doing what she loved and many times got me to try something new, go father or push harder. Whether it was Bikram yoga, where I melted into the floor and Carrie ably moved through the poses, or snorkeling in Costa Rica far, far, far from shore, so far I could no longer make out the rest of the group back on the shore, or taking a ski trail that we shouldn’t have and nearly getting trapped in the back bowls of Vail, Carrie was always encouraging, always reassuring and always smiling.
Let’s talk about the shopping. I 100% have Carrie to thank for upping my fashion sense. She had a natural ability to put together an outfit and always looked amazing. Carrie coordinated what I wore on my wedding day. She convinced me that dramatic blue earrings were an important statement piece that was 100% necessary. She later wrote how she still remembered how they made my eyes pop. There is one epic shopping trip where Jimmy Choo got a lot of our business. Carrie explained that every woman executive needed a couple pair of statement shoes and they should never be boring. The pair of eggplant, buckle shoes she purchased that day were nothing but boring, exactly how I would describe Carrie.
Carrie’s generosity applied to everything and everyone she loved, and many of the friendships Chris and I have today are because of her and Dale. It was one wintry Sunday, where Carrie had suggested we set up our husbands on a “play date” to watch some football at a favorite bar in Madison, NJ. From that day forward Chris and Dale were fast friends, "two brothers from different mothers” as Carrie often described them. From that friendship it grew to include other friends and loved ones of Carrie with whom, both Chris and I are blessed to have enjoyed vacations, dinners, barbecues, golf, Super Bowl parties and NYC shenanigans.
I have so much to thank Carrie for, from the friendships I have, to vacations destinations I would have never visited. Chris and I find ourselves noticing things daily that we have or saw or experienced because of Carrie, but bottom line, what I have to thank Carrie for most, is for making me a better person. When looking at a person’s legacy, I don’t think there is anything more powerful than helping others be the best they can be. I feel honored to be able to call Carrie a friend and will forever find ways to honor her by living what she taught me. Andrea found a quote about beautiful people that I will end with and that I think captures Carrie perfectly.
"Sometimes people are beautiful. Not in looks. Not in what they say. Just in what they are" - Markus Zusak